I was christened as a baby and my grandparents went to church but my mum didn’t. And then when I was 14 my mum started making me go to Bible Class at church (don’t ask, I don’t know why). But the more I learnt about religion, the more I didn’t like it. I took Relious Studies at school because it was something that I was still interested in and I wanted to find out more. But the more I read the bible, the more things I found that I disagreed with.
I used to say that I was agnostic, that I wasn’t sure if there was a god or not. It seemed reasonable that there must be something. Surely we aren’t here by accident, there must be meaning to our lives. I didn’t think the bible was perfect, I saw it more as a collection of stories that are supposed to teach your morals like aesop’s fables.
But as I read stories about how people were treated, particularly women, something just didn’t feel right. And as I read the 613 rules in the bible, the more I started to feel like it was designed to put fear in people, to control them. And I listened to my minister’s sermons and it started to sound like threats. If you don’t do as we say, you will go to hell.
In the end, I decided that there just can’t be a god. I can’t understand why a god would allow so much innocent suffering in the world. And I believe that you can be a good person even if you don’t live your life by the rules of the bible.
Sorry if all that sounds kind of negative, or offensive. It is something that I have thought about a lot.
Further to my answer to a previous question, it is because it is contrary to how I view the world as a scientist: I find it hard to believe in something when there is no evidence or where you are unable to question aspects of the religion.